Monday, 15 March 2010

King Julian

[12:57] Julian Battitude: i am the king!
[12:57] Julian Battitude: lmao
[12:57] Julian Battitude looks down and blinks, "pay no attention to the skirt!

Esmie xXx

Monday, 8 March 2010

Tseenik prepares for a date

[15:27] Tseenik Miles: should I get him some flowers or something?
[15:28] Esmiel Posthorn: Wow you are old fashioned
[15:28] Esmiel Posthorn: Just make sure you take a condom
[15:28] Esmiel Posthorn: :P
[15:28] Esmiel Posthorn: I have a rose you can give him
[15:28] Esmiel Posthorn: lol
[15:28] Tseenik Miles: so that would be ixnay on the lowersfa
[15:29] Esmiel Posthorn: Well, I am not a flower fan
[15:29] Esmiel Posthorn: I dunno about this guy
[15:29] Tseenik Miles: what do you give.... a body piercing?
[15:29] Tseenik Miles: hehhehehehheheh
[15:29] Esmiel Posthorn: My cock, usually
[15:29] Esmiel Posthorn: :P
[15:29] Tseenik Miles: heheh

I think I helped

Esmie xXx

Thursday, 4 March 2010

Viewer 2.0 Beta

So, I was reading a bunch of forum posts about how sucky the new 2.0 viewer is, and I must admit, I agreed with 99% of them. It is clunky and dull and makes my head hurt; it is too dark, the things that matter are too small, such as text and pictures, and bullshit is too big... such as big grey borders and fucking stupid buttons. One forum post was just so perfect, so wonderful, I had to paste it in here to keep it forever and to share with everyone. It was initially a reply to a post about how Picks have been ruined.

Prokofky Neva:

I couldn't agree more.

And when I see how *consciously* the picks have been destroyed, along with search/places, classifieds on the avatar, etc. I have to wonder if the Lindens held a weekend seminar in which they said:

"How can we break inworld business even more than we've already broken it with land glutting, price hikes and dumps, freebies/commissions policies changes on x-street? How can we *really* bring it to its knees?"

So Schumpeter Linden says, "I know, let's destroy the engine of sales, search/places, by making it unusable, let's fill it with junk, no longer sorted by traffic relevance, and returning only 3 items per search -- that will do it."

Then Darwin Linden says "Let's savage Picks. Let's take them out as an automatic until somebody figures out to use EDIT-something to see them. Then let's make them less visible and hide half the text -- Picks only drive inworld commerce to stores inworld away from our Xstreet property where we collect commission, so let's be sure to really mess this one up."

Then Clusterflock Linden says, "The way to make this look like Facebook, but destroy any semblance of usability like Facebook or the old SL, is to put all the messages in a big black box bunch at the bottom right, where people won't find it easy to look for, and keep it flashing and piling up like a deck of cards. That way, we can drive people to socialize on Avatars United, shop on Xstreet, and not burden our servers by actually being in world, except long enough to take pictures of themselves to put on their fashion blogs."

Then Taylorism Linden says, "Wait, I got a way we can shave some minutes off that experience, too. Let's bork the camera controls, ruin the commands for snapshots, and make taking pictures a mess too -- that will put paid to that extra behaviour."

Then M Linden says, "But then why would anybody bother to log on?"

Stallman Linden then replies, "Just long enough to use all the third-party viewers we're going to give a pass to even under our new rules to copy the content and port it over to Opensim."

I hate the new viewer. Emerald for Life.

Esmie xXx

Hug time!

[10:41] Enzeru Onizuka wanders by, swipes a hug.
[10:42] Esmiel Posthorn is suddenly force-hugged and loves it .__.
[10:43] Enzeru Onizuka hugs you harder, "That's right, bitch. Take it. Take it." >:D
[10:43] Enzeru Onizuka the hug rapist.
[10:44] Esmiel Posthorn squeals.. "Ahh! Ahh! Oh fuck yeah, thats good hugs.."
[10:46] Enzeru Onizuka hugs the hell out of you, "Yeah, I knew you wanted it. Those perfectly sensible and covering clothes of yours screamed that you wanted it."
[10:47] Esmiel Posthorn wipes the sweat from his brow and tries to squeeze you back.. "Yeah, I was gagging for a good hugging.. I'm so lucky such a well hung hug-stud was passing.."

Esmie xXx

Wednesday, 3 March 2010

Silfadion's Little Problem.

[9:39] Esmiel Posthorn: Is it big?
[9:40] Silfadion Haefnir: your thumb.
[9:40] Silfadion Haefnir: From the middle joint to the end of the nail.
[9:40] Esmiel Posthorn: Oh thats pretty big
[9:40] Esmiel Posthorn: I have held bigger
[9:40] Esmiel Posthorn: Lol Just chuck it out the window
[9:41] Silfadion Haefnir: I. Am. Not. Touching. It.
[9:41] Esmiel Posthorn: Hang on.. I'll be right over
[9:41] Esmiel Posthorn: Lol.
[9:41] Esmiel Posthorn: Is it on the wall
[9:41] Silfadion Haefnir: I don't know where it is.
[9:42] Silfadion Haefnir: Hurry dude HURRRYYY
[9:42] Silfadion Haefnir: xD
[9:42] Esmiel Posthorn: I wish we lived next door to each other lol
[9:42] Esmiel Posthorn: That would be epic
[9:42] Silfadion Haefnir: LOL that would be hilarious.
[9:42] Esmiel Posthorn: Get your dad to hunt the beetle down? lol
[9:42] Esmiel Posthorn: I am sure he can deal with it
[9:44] Esmiel Posthorn: Are you sure you're not just imagining this?
[9:45] Esmiel Posthorn: Did the beetle eat you?
[9:49] Esmiel Posthorn: Can I have your stuff?
[9:49] Silfadion Haefnir: o_______o
[9:49] Silfadion Haefnir: Dad's asleep.
[9:49] Silfadion Haefnir: I'm alone with no siblings, no boyfriend and no girlfriend.
[9:49] Esmiel Posthorn: You have a shoe, don't you? SMASH that fucker
[9:51] Esmiel Posthorn: You can do this.. I believe in you.
[9:52] Silfadion Haefnir sobs, afraid. "I don't know where he went!!"
[9:53] Esmiel Posthorn gives you encouragement from ten thousand miles away.. "Just be ready for it to emerge, then finish it with a shoe or book before it can bite you!"
[9:53] Silfadion Haefnir: O_____O
[9:54] Silfadion Haefnir: Beetles can...biteee?
[9:54] Esmiel Posthorn: Oh, no, did i say that?
[9:54] Esmiel Posthorn: I meant.. hug.
[9:54] Silfadion Haefnir: But it has a freaky underside
[9:54] Silfadion Haefnir: I dont wanna be HUGGED.
[9:55] Esmiel Posthorn: THEN KILL IT
[9:55] Silfadion Haefnir: I DONT KNOW WHERE IT WENT.
[9:55] Silfadion Haefnir: XDDD
[9:55] Esmiel Posthorn: Just don't go to sleep
[9:55] Esmiel Posthorn: That's when they crawl in your mouth
[9:55] Esmiel Posthorn: I have to go out to the Cinema now ~ Good luck

Esmie xXx

Tuesday, 2 March 2010

Birthday Surprise.

[7:14] Kyris Upshaw: WTF YOU SONNOVA BITCH O:
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw: whens your birfday?
[7:15] Esmiel Posthorn: WHAT?
[7:15] Esmiel Posthorn: omg March 10th
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw screams at you
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw: saaaaaaame
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw: >:O
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw: we is birthday buddehs
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw: HUG ME NOW
[7:15] Esmiel Posthorn: OMG NO
[7:15] Esmiel Posthorn: OMG YES
[7:15] Esmiel Posthorn HUGS YOU
[7:15] Kyris Upshaw HUGS!!!

You learn something new every day.

Esmie xXx

Monday, 1 March 2010

A Neutral Avatar Mesh

My new friend Sakito Nakamichi has posted this suggestion on the JIRA:

Basically, he suggests a medium avatar mesh in between female and male with no major defining characteristics; for example: no breasts, better distribution of muscles and a more androgynous skeleton that works better with scaling at the lower ends; I am sure we've all seen how horrific the male mesh looks when you have reduce the size of muscles and height down past a certain level.

If you don't know how to vote, then look on the left of the page, sign in using your usual SL name and password, and then click 'Vote for link'. With enough votes, we can get the Lindens to seriously consider this proposal and then we won't have to use the female template to build cute gay boys anymore. (Not that I do - but it is extremely difficult to get more feminine than me without either having horrific shoulder blades or tiny boobs.)

Esmie xXx