Away for the Weekend

My creator is off to visit his family and boyfriend in London for the weekend... Not sure if I will return before Monday night or Tuesday morning, or if I'll be on at all over the weekend. If anybody wonders where I am over the next few days, I'm on holiday for a bit. I'm gonna miss SL, all my friends and Upo, but I will be back before you know it.

Hung out with Andy and Jay this evening. Two great guys, loved just chilling by the hot tub and listening to their banter. See you all soon!


Esmie xXx

Gotta Love SL

OK... Time to say it's official now. Upo and I are together and out of the 5 million residents of SL, there is nobody else I would rather be with. We were enjoying a beautiful moonlit dance on the
beach by ourselves when some guy came up to us, told us we were both really cute and proceeded to ask each of us through IM if we wanted to meet up with him after we were 'finished here'.

This will make me sound like an asshole I know, but what is it with these ugly, careless noobs that think they would even have a chance if we were single, let alone in a relationship. I'm just not in SL to fuck anyone (or anything, for that matter). I don't want loads of sex. I just want to spend time with Upo and my friends and have fun. Shagging some silly noob who doesnt even have a working cock is not my idea of fun.

But, I do want to help noobs. I want everyone who joins SL to become part of our community and build it into a better place. If I can get just one of them to stay in SL and for them to get the same pleasure from it that I do, my time here will not have been wasted. Now that I have been promoted in the Beach Bums and have the ability to add members, I feel as if I really can help people, do some good and let the Missions get on with more important things. I actually wish I could do more to help and really show how much I appreciate what Boots and Shawn have done for us.

Esmie xXx

Memorial

I decided to go for a stroll through Provincetown today, the area located next to Boots Gay Beach. I found a memorial there, dedicated to all those who lost their lives due to homophobia and prejudice. It's the single most moving and emotional thing I have seen in all of Second Life. I stood there for almost half an hour in silence, crying on and off as it made me comprehend the tragedy of our own selfish human feelings and the utter stupidity of our hatred. I tried to rez a small red rose to leave as a token of respect for all those the memorial was dedicated to, but the parcel wouldn't allow it.

No matter how much I cry, or how much work I do, I know I can never change human nature by myself. It will require all of us working together, and I hope one day it may be possible. But I know it won’t be in my lifetime.

Esmie xXx

Karl Dorance and Sterling Whitcroft

Married Saturday 24th of March
I wish them all the best and I am extremely happy for them. Two truly wonderful guys.

In the picture:
Celty Westwick, his partner Jamie Cheeky, Dagon Harrison, Bruce Liebneckt, Mike Maximov, Sterling Whitcroft, Karl Dorance, DJ/Priest Wesley Spengler, Me, Upo Choche, Marc Petronius,
Jasmine 'Jazz' Digital

Goodbye

I decided to end my relationship with Tomasio today. I had several reasons for doing it, most of them pretty crappy so I won't list them or anything. I don't need to explain myself, I just need to put this down in writing so it is solid and real. This Life is so much harder than the one my creator has been through. He can't use his own experiences to guide me any more so I'm gonna have to figure stuff out as I go along. It won't be easy, but at least I won't feel as if something is holding me back or stopping me from experiencing everything I would like to. 



A lot of things like this have been happening recently with the people on Boots Beach... couples splitting up, relationships changing. Its not only an ending, but a new beginning too and I look forward to exploring the limits of this life to the max.

Esmie xXx

Lucky Me

I'm so lucky to have such good friends in Second Life. They have always been there for me to cheer me up and help me out. I only met Upo recently, but he is such an incredible guy. So funny, friendly and gorgeous, he's been a real help to me while Tomasio is away. He 'went neko' too and looks absolutely amazing as one. He spent so much time on it and looks so beautiful... almost opposite in looks to me, we look amazing together. Micah Moore put me on to a fantastic shop called Kalico Kreations, full of neat gadgets, accessories and clothes in a goth/emo style. Its exactly the kind of place I've been looking for, and KK even has some neko parts coming to its shelves over the next day or so, I'm definitely going to be checking those out.

Me and Upo in our Neko forms.

Upo and Me dancing on the beach

We had a cow dancing party on the beach yesterday... It was interesting to say the least. I'll see if I can get some pictures on here asap.

Esmie xXx

A Lonely Weekend Ahead

Tomasio's mother was taken ill today and he had to rush off to be with his family, saying he would be back in a few days if things go well. I hope she is ok and that Tom can get on SL from where he is staying, otherwise I'm gonna get a little lonely until he comes back. I do have loads of great friends to be with so hopefully they can keep me company.

I got some new clothes and stuff, the most exciting bits coming from Gritty Kitty, who have a new line of hairstyles coming out. Judging by the quality of the Gazette style I bought, they should be quite spectacular. This is me in my new garb, including aforementioned hair with the teddy Gabe bought me a little while ago.

Esmie xXx

Esmie goes 'Emo'

I don't like emo music. I don't like the emo mentality or ideology. But I love the emo look, so I had to give it a go using a 'white' skin with eyeliner from Aitui, the Kai hair from Here Comes Trouble and a load of piercings from all over the place. I'm generally happy with the result, having modded my face and body shape to be a little thinner and slightly more masculine.

I will continue fiddling with it a bit, but I am satisfied for the moment. Others seem to like it too so I'm pleased!

Esmie xXx

I Changed A Bit

I decided a change to myself a little bit. Such is the joy of this Second Life that I can change whatever I like and then change back if I hate it or change my mind. I bought a new neko and human skin. The Golden Leopard Neko skin I am keeping because it looks amazing. The new human one does not. The demo was amazing, but the real thing didn't quite look right. However, I modified my shape slightly to fit the new human skin and found this new shape to look pretty good with my old skin too. So, I've dumped the new skin in my inventory, slipped the old skin back on and spruced it up with a new tattoo.


Here is me in my lovely golden skin with the brown cat eyes I got long ago.

Esmie xXx

The Last Day of My Teenage Years.

Tomorrow, I will be 20. To some people, that may be not such a big deal. Others might think I am lucky for being just 20. Once upon a time, all I wanted to do was grow up and be an adult. I hated being young and insignificant. Right now, I wish I could go back to being a care-free kid again, just so I could know the meaning of true irresponsibility and naivety. I am turning 20 because that is how old my creator will be. He doesn't see the point in making me a different age from him or keeping me trapped in time.

This leads me to thinking. How do the residents of SL determine how much of their RL enters their avatar? I know they can set their own limits and use as little or as much as they feel comfortable with. I embody what my creator wishes to be in RL. I keep his favourite bits from RL and add my own twist on things. I don't know why he made me his RL age rather than 16 or 26. I don't know why he gives away so much about himself on my profile. All I can say is that by using himself as a basis he gives me a lot to work with and build from and I hope I can enjoy my adulthood just as much as he will.



The pics are of me and my dear friend Hett enjoying the view from the shoulder of a scale model of Christ The Redeemer. Such a beautiful, calm place to sit and be lost in our thoughts. These were taken a couple of weeks ago.



Esmie xXx

Another Day, Another Hairstyle

Yeah, I know. Although the hair I bought from Naughty Designs a long time ago is completely perfect in every way, I still feel the need to spend my money on extra hairstyles. Sometimes they are never worn, but this new style is a keeper, for sure. I love the messy style and easy, loose flexibility of this piece. I have long admired the hair at Cake, and have bought a few styles there before. However, the most popular ones I feel are overpriced (300L for one colour, whereas Naughty do 3 colours for that price). The selection to the side of the main display houses some interesting and unusual styles, of which I am forever trying and deliberating over. Today is the first time I actually bought one of these 'sideshow' pieces and I am extremely impressed with the quality and value for money. 5 colours for 325L (I think!) is very reasonable. I love seeing the new styles at Cake every time I go there and I hope this will not be my last purchase there.
A quick note: I now own four pairs of glasses from FNKY!, the store that lives with Cake. The sheer quality of the products and accessories available at FNKY! defies belief and is my first stop on any accessory hunt.

Esmie xXx

Tomasio and Me

Goodnight Kiss
Tomasio and Esmiel

Pixies

Dagon needed some new wings... It became a new form for him as he decided to be my pixie companion. We decided he should be a fire elmental... a magical being with pyrokinematic ablilties and characteristics. My pixie, with it's pale blue hair and wings naturally suited being an Ice pixie. So, Fire and Ice are united in Dagon and I, two very different halves of a dynamic duo. Our tiny avatars and fluttery wings lend a natural air of childish innocence and mishief to our meetings. Combined with the very different magic we both posess, it is only expected that our meetings end in a general mess and have scared a few newbies.

The pics are of Me and Dagon transfixed by his ability to control flame.

Esmie xXx

The Beach

Boots North Beach is no more. Boots West Beach is now the centre of the Beach Bums' gatherings and we are all the better for it. We have the same old beloved campfire and beach towels as before, but now with added hot tub, deck chairs, dance balls and picnic blankets. I'm sure as hell gonna miss the old beach, covered now as it is with a nuclear power station (!?). It is an ending and a beginning, and the great care and love Shawn and Boots have for the Beach Bums shines through in the effort and time they put selflessly into making our Second Lives better.

Almost all my friends were made at the old North Beach, and my fondest memories are there. This new West Beach, with it's gorgeous surround of jungle and desert islands will be a place that I am certain will hold many more memories for me and my friends in times to come.


Still no picture of Tomasio... I just can't find an angle that will do him justice. So here is a picture of me in my new outfit.

Esmie xXx

Happiness In The Shape Of A Man

Although I have only known him a week or so, Tomasio has changed my life so much for the better. After the pain my last relationship in SL caused I decided never to have a partner there again, for fear of just getting people hurt. Oddly enough, it was my ex Gabe who suggested I rethink my plans. It was obvious to him that I was lonely and sad... Thanks to him I realise now how unhappy I was being alone.

Tomasio unceasingly complimented me and tried making advances towards me from the first moment I met him on the beach. Initially, I was wary and thought he might become a stalker. When I got to know him a little better it was obvious that he wasn't. He was willing to reveal as much about himself as I wished and I trusted him from that moment on. Quite simply, he is an amazing person who simply gives me everything I need and could wish for in my Second Life, without encroaching on my First Life. I adore him to bits and hope that we will remain together for a long time. I cannot believe I don't have a photo of him yet... but that will follow soon.

Esmie xXx